Balanced View Silfan Rhys Jones: To Completely Love - 5.31.15 from Balanced View Trainers on Vimeo.

"It is a radical and revolutionary political action to find inner peace within yourself. The greatest revolution is in claiming personal peace for yourself— and not giving up until you find that. Your undying commitment to that peace automatically benefits everyone else. You don’t have to contrive the action of being of benefit to anyone; you are being of benefit to everyone by finding peace within yourself, and there is nothing more powerful than a sincere personal example. You don’t have to launch any grand plans in order to be of benefit to everyone. If nothing else should ever come out of your life than this extraordinary inner peace, that in itself will be a supreme and sublime accomplishment." 

From Clarity in Everyday Life, Balanced View

Balanced View

My search is over!
Balanced View

www.elliotterwitt.com

William James

"I am done with great things and big plans, great institutions and big success.  I am for those tiny, invisible loving human forces that work from individual to individual, creeping through the crannies of the world like so many rootlets, or like the capillary oozing of water, which, if given time, will rend the hardest monuments of pride." - William James

quoted from Susan Jeffers' book Embracing Uncertainty

Tony de Wolf

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery's first chapter says it all!

So here are my paintings!

Wild Geese

Image

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain

are moving across the landscapes,

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination,

calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting -

over and over announcing your place

in the family of things.

Mary Oliver

Nonviolent Communication

Centre for Nonviolent Communication

NVC UK

Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

From page 114:

"It was early in the Vietnam War, and an American platoon was hunkered down in some rice paddies, in the heat of a firefight with the Vietcong. Suddenly a line of six monks started walking along the elevated berms that separated paddy from paddy. Perfectly calm and poised, the monks walked directly toward the line of fire.

"They didn't look right, they didn't look left. They walked straight through," recalls David Busch, one of the American soldiers. "It was really strange, because nobody shot at 'em. And after they walked over the berm, suddenly all the fight was out of me. It just didn't feel like I wanted to do this anymore, at least not that day. It must have been that way for everybody, because everybody quit. We just stopped fighting.""

Helen Simmonds

image from Jonathan Cooper Gallery

FLOW by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

If I quoted everything from this book that I wanted to, the post would be as long as my arm! - here are my top two:

From p33:

"The shape and content of life depend on how attention has been used. Entirely different realities will emerge depending on how it is invested...We create ourselves by how we invest this [psychic] energy...hence attention is our most important tool in the task of improving the quality of experience."

From p208:

"We all start with preconceived notions of what we want from life. These include the basic needs programmed into us by our genes to ensure survival - the need for food, comfort, sex, dominance over other beings. They also include the desires that our specific culture has inculcated in us - to be slim, rich, educated, and well-liked. If we embrace these goals and are lucky, we may replicate the ideal physical and social image for our historical time and place. But is this the best use of our psychic energy? And what if we cannot realise these ends? We will never become aware of other possibilities unless, like the painter who watches with care what is happening on the canvas, we pay attention to what is happening around us, and evaluate events on the basis of how they make us feel, rather than evaluating them exclusively in terms of preconceived notions. If we do so we my discover that, contrary to what we are led to believe...it is more enjoyable to talk with one's two-year-old than to play golf with the company president."

photo from Milk Photos

Happiness

So early it's still almost dark out.
I'm near the window with coffee,
and the usual early morning stuff
that passes for thought.
When I see the boy and his friend
walking up the road
to deliver the newspaper.
They wear caps and sweaters,
and one boy has a bag over his shoulder.
They are so happy
they aren't saying anything, these boys.
I think if they could, they would take
each other's arm.
It's early in the morning,
and they are doing this thing together.
They come on, slowly.
The sky is taking on light,
though the moon still hangs pale over the water.
Such beauty that for a minute
death and ambition, even love,
doesn't enter into this.
Happiness. It comes on
unexpectedly. And goes beyond, really,
any early morning talk about it.

Raymond Carver

picture from here

Healing without Freud or Prozac

A book by Dr David Servan-Schreiber (thanks Andrew for the lend of it)

From the end of the chapter Love Is a Biological Need:

"Thankfully, this important key to our emotional brain does not depend on a partner's love alone. Actually, it depends on the quality of all our emotional bonds - with our children, our parents, our brothers and sisters, our friends, our animals. What is important is the feeling of being fully oneself with someone else. To be able to show we are weak and vulnerable, as well as strong and radiant. To be able to laugh, but also to cry. To feel that our emotions are understood. To know that we are useful and important to someone. And to have a minimum of warm physical contacts. Quite simply, to be loved."

From the chapter The Larger Connection (Quoting Abraham Maslow):

"'The best way to become a better helper is to become a better person. But one necessary aspect of becoming a better person is via helping other people. So one can and must do both simultaneously.'"

Here's the author's website which is full of useful info: www.instincttoheal.org

photo by Caroline Phelan

Do You Not Know That I Need To Touch You

Do you not know that I need to touch you

as I touch a fruit or child?

Knowledge I need of you that comes not with words.

Let me touch your hair, your moving lip,

the bone beneath the gentle skin.

I will not harm you - I do not want your sex.

Trust me to touch you and to leave you whole.

Frances Horovitz (1938-83)

Mark Williams on Mindfulness

Mark Williams on Mindfulness from The School of Life on Vimeo.

"What mindfulness training is partly about is waking up to the actual life that we live. It's not trying to get somewhere based on fear - it's actually a way of discerning what our deepest values are, and living in line with those values."

Or, as Jon Kabat-Zin puts it...

"...start to pay attention to what might be most fundamental in our lives rather than most urgent."

(You can watch him on YouTube here)

http://www.toast.co.uk/

Master the twenty-four hours

"All of us are apprenticed to the same teacher that the religious institutions originally worked with: reality. Reality-insight says...master the twenty-four hours.

Do it well, without self-pity. It is as hard to get the children herded into the car pool and down the road to the bus as it is to chant sutras in the Buddha-hall on a cold morning. One move is not better than the other, each can be quite boring, and they both have the virtuous quality of repetition.

Repetition and ritual and their good results come in many forms. Changing the filter, wiping noses, going to meetings, picking up around the house, washing dishes, checking the dipstick - don't let yourself think these are distracting you from your more serious pursuits. Such a round of chores is not a set of difficulties we hope to escape from so that we may do our "practice" which will put us on a "path" - it is our path."

Gary Snider, The Practice of the Wild, from Jon Kabbat-Zin's book, Wherever You Go, There You Are.

Brene Brown on vulnerability

(http://www.manitoulinliving.com/photo_gallery.htm)

Optimism and Resilience in Schools

All in the Mind - Tuesday 17th November 2009:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00nvhvn/All_in_the_Mind_17_11_2009/

"In a special edition, Claudia Hammond talks to the father of positive psychology, Professor Martin Seligman, about why optimism is not only good for your health, but could also help you live longer. Claudia visits a school which has introduced happiness lessons with some surprising results..."

http://www.toast.co.uk/

Self-Compassion

photo by Jusin Jin http://www.horseboymovie.com/film-team.php

Introducing Kristin Neff and her work on self-compassion:

"Self-compassion is a concept borrowed from Buddhist psychology, and entails self-kindness, feelings of interconnectedness, and mindfulness."

Her website: http://www.self-compassion.org/

From the Introduction of 'The Compassionate Mind' by Paul Gilbert, founder of the Compassionate Mind Foundation:

"What is extremely exciting is that the last 30 years or so have seen the science of psychology and studies of the human brain begin to put compassion, caring, and pro-social behaviour centre stage in the development of well-being, mental health and our capacity to foster harmonious relationships.."

http://www.compassionatemind.co.uk/

M.I.L.K Photography: Feast Your Eyes!

Sudipto Das, India

http://www.milkphotos.com/

Beyond The Beauty Myth

(photo from http://photography-now.net/)

From p285 of "The Beauty Myth" by Naomi Wolf:

"And we will learn that what is good about "beauty" - the promise of confidence, sexuality, and the self-regard of a healthy individual - are actually qualities that have nothing to do with "beauty" specifically, but are deserved by and, as the myth is dismantled, available to us all by right of femaleness. When we separate "beauty" from sexuality, when we celebrate the individuality of our features and characteristics, women will have access to a pleasure in our bodies that unites us rather than divides us."

In Praise of Slow

Carl Honore, author of "In Praise of Slow", gives (a fast paced!) introduction to the Slow Movement:

From p34 of his book, where he talks about The Society for the Deceleration of Time, who run 'speed traps' in town centres:

A few sites that may help with finding your own tempo giusto:

http://slowfood.com/

http://www.slowlab.net/

http://www.slowmovement.com/

The Fun Theory!

(photo from:http://www.flickr.com/photos/beija-flor/229632970/in/set-72157594253443546/)

From the Fun Theorists:

"We believe that the easiest way to change people's behaviour for the better is by making it fun to do. We call it The Fun Theory."

http://www.thefuntheory.com/

On Rest

From p153 of "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle:

"Your physical energy is also subject to cycles. It cannot always be at a peak. There will be times of low as well as high energy. There will be periods of when you are highly active and creative, but there will also be times when everything seems stagnant, when it seems that you are not getting anywhere, not achieving anything. A cycle can last for anything from a few hours to a few years. There are large cycles and small cycles within these large ones...the cycles of low energy...are vital for regeneration."

Roger Deakin: 'The Garden' on Radio 4

(Photo from: http://cotswoldbookseller.wordpress.com/)

Listen again to the programme

or you can go directly to the website:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/science/thegarden.shtml

where you will also see a link to the other programme where he talks about his house.

Thanks to John for the links.

In the Spirit of Mindfulness

From p78 of "Wherever You Go, There You Are" by Jon Kabat-Zinn:

"If you believe in love, do you manifest it or just talk a lot? If you believe in compassion, in non-harming, in kindness, in generosity, in calmness, in solitude, in non-doing, in being even-handed and clear, do you manifest these qualities in your daily life?"

Chinese inscription cited by Thoreau in Walden (on p79 of the same book):

"Renew thyself completely each day; do it again, and again, and forever again."

Now for some laughter therapy!

Patch Adams and the Gesundheit Institute run Humanitarian Clowning Trips! :o)
http://www.patchadams.org/

Oxytocin

Oxytocin lowers blood pressure, promotes growth and healing, and has a calming affect.

What leads to the release of oxytocin?

• touch
• warmth
• a full stomach
• sexual activity
• social interaction

For more on oxytocin:

"The Oxytocin Factor - Tapping the hormone of calm, love and healing" by Kerstin Uvnas Moberg.

Here is a link to one of her papers: http://www.richardhill.com.au/oxytocin.pdf

Stuart Weir, UK http://www.milkphotos.com/

We Are What We Do

Their motto:

http://www.wearewhatwedo.org/

From Robert F Kennedy:

"It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centres of energy and daring, those ripples build a current which can sweep down the highest walls of oppression and injustice."

From Margaret Mead:

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens can change the world."

Anna Kuperberg, USA http://www.milkphotos.com/

This Little Light

Umm Summer

Oh The Issue of Work!

From p126 of "The Highly Sensitive Person" by Elaine Aron:

From Harold Whitman:

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who come alive."

I found this quote here:

http://www.joyful-work-for-sensitive-people.com/

A Kinder, Gentler Philosophy of Success

The Visual Whispers of Tashan

From Tania and Eddie Tashan:

"We enjoy to tell stories, whisper, make film, invent words, smile, shoot photos, play real, visualise ideas, make love, walk, dreamscape, travel, draw, change the colours, collect stones and do magic."

http://tashanproductions.tumblr.com/

"This Voice" is by Ane Brun

A Bit More for the Heart

From Rilke:

"Be patient with all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now."

From p117 of "The Highly Sensitive Person in Love" by Elaine Aron:

"Doing even a little can bring more love into your life - you do not have to build Sangri-la in a day, or even build it at all. Some affection between you and someone else would do, and it is the rare person who does not desire affection."

These ladies might be able to help with matters of the heart if you need it:

Dr Jo Lee:

http://www.newforestlifecoaching.co.uk/

Marion van der Stad:

http://www.aquarion.nl/

Wisdom of the Heart

The Wisdom of the Heart from the 14th Dalai Lama, Nobel Peace Prize Laureate (1989)

1. Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
2. Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
3. Sleep is the best meditation.
4. Spend some time alone every day.
5. We can never make peace with the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.
6. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.
7. We can live without religion and meditation, but we cannot survive without human affection.
8. Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
9. If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.
10. The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual's own reason and critical analysis.

From:http://www.doctorhugo.org/DalaiLama.html

Viewpoint

Readings by Robert Macfarlane

(photo from http://www.milkwood.tv/projects/ghost-species/)

There is a series of four readings by Robert Macfarlane from his book "The Wild Places", the first of which is here:

Episode 1: island

or you can visit Toast:

http://www.toast.co.uk/content/TheWildPlacesAW07.htm?menu=media

where you will be able to listen without downloading, and where you will also find the other three.

It's like having someone read to you - perfect for when you can't sleep.

Introducing ODE Magazine

So that you can choose to fill your head with good news instead of bad:

http://www.odemagazine.com/

Rachel please look after yourself as if you were looking after this version of you!

Some assistance with the problem of choice

Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs from p98 of "Psychology" by Richard Gross (3rd Ed)

If you are here, I imagine you share my interest in how we can thrive and support others in that too - I would absolutely love it if by chancing upon this blog you found the website of BALANCED VIEW.  The peace and relief! I can't tell you.. please see for yourself, and thank you for your visit here x